Before constructing an outline for the critical analysis essay, there was an assignment called an annotated bibliography we had to complete. I used outside information to obtain more information for my research topic which was family involvement in their child’s sports activities. It was a stepping stone for the final essay because I already have the sources and outside information, I need to support my claim, I just need to put it all together. After the annotated bibliography, I started an outline to structure and organize all my ideas. The introduction introduces my topic and a broader idea about volleyball games and support from parents. Then, it starts to get more specific about how parent involvement is an important aspect in the child’s game play. The body paragraphs each had supporting statements and ideas from my sources and research with explanations. I also included a rebuttal to showcase a stronger point of view on how family involvement has a huge influence on children. From gathering information through the internet and observations from the work and family class, I was able to construct a well-developed essay. 

I want my audience to be able to be more knowledgeable and understanding after reading my essay. My target audience are parents with children who play sports. Through the outside information I gathered, I hope parents would understand and be more supportive of their child. However, there are situations where parents don’t have the free time to attend their children’s games even if they wanted to. I wanted the parents to be able to connect with my writing and open up to their kids by supporting their daily sports activities as much as possible. I obtained information and evidence through readings from outside sources, observations, and research hoping it could change the parent’s viewpoint. Parents should always support their child because it could be their motivation and lead to healthier relationships. Also, I hope the children will understand that everything their parents do is for them to have a better life.  

My draft had to be proofread by the professor and my peers. After, getting the edited version back, I realized I had many opinion-based statements in my writing. I read over those statements many times and realized how ridiculous it sounds. I made terrible assumptions about parents with no evidence to back it up. For my citations at the end of the essay, I made a huge mistake of copying and pasting the website instead of citing it properly. I fixed it and have it in alphabetical order after being given a second chance. One of my biggest problems was that the sources I used for my annotated bibliography didn’t contribute to my essay because I realized it wasn’t relevant after I reread it. I had to search up information that makes my claim stronger, thus I used articles separate from the annotated bibliography.

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